choking

reflections

air

As a child, very young, I was rushed to the hospital with the croup. As my mother tells it, I was sick and she went in to check on me when I was taking a nap . . . and I was gray. That was Christmas Eve 1970. I was 18 months old. I remember it.  I remember being in the hospital… Continue reading air

dreams

nephew, demon

[This is directly transcribed, without changes or edits, from a journal entry dated September 12th, 2001] And in my dream my three-year-old nephew [REDACTED] — plagued by depression and despair all his short little life — has finally given into his despair, twisting a length of picture hanging wire around his neck and hanging himself. I find his stiff body eyes… Continue reading nephew, demon

dreams

the blood curse

Blood, spelling out a hastily scrawled curse or warning: “IF YOU CONTINUE, YOU WON’T SEE THE END. IF YOU WRITE IT, IT WILL NEVER BE READ. IF YOU TELL THE STORY, NO ON WILL LISTEN.” And blood scrawling away to nothing.  A moment to pause and gasp. And the voice of Constantine rises within. “You want to fuck with me? I’ll bloody choke… Continue reading the blood curse

dreams

mother, father, cat

Do demons stand still? Can you look for them in corners or out of the way places? Do demons stop long enough for you to see them? Do demons stand near us? Where do they stand? In the dream, my house has been transformed into a filthy hole. The kitchen is a mess, bits of food, dirty pots and pans, and… Continue reading mother, father, cat